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I Never Knew Taking a Shit Could Be So Sexual

by tinyhands

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1.
Should I tell my dog that he's adopted? Or just not to trust the government? How do I teach him not to eat out of the trash when that's what people do when they're starving? Some would say "Why don't they just stop being so poor and homeless?" Don't you ever speak to me or my dog ever again Should I tell my dog to "get a job" like they say to you when you protest? How do I teach him not to destroy pieces of cloth when that's what people do when there's unrest? And if a burning flag offends you, why you just look the other way like you do when you see oppression every day? Should I tell my dog that he's adopted? Do you think that he would understand? How do I teach him not to fight with other dogs when that's what people do when someone's not like them? Some would say "Violence is not the answer," but if you see a Nazi I think you should punch 'em! And tell 'em not to speak to you or your dog ever again
2.
I don't care about you or all your new tattoos All those songs I wrote about you made me famous for a minute on the side walk out in Portland You're still drinking every morning just to hold still And talking about leaving And getting your fill on pretty girls who touch you in private places Their faded faces Taking space never took so much out of me And all I can remember is how much you hated yourself every time you saw me naked And vomit your emotions Your devotion to me and the drink You're on the brink of drowning in the bathtub or cheap whiskey How nice of you to come by and say Hi After all this time I think you're alright As far as assholes go... I know you think I fucked you just to piss off someone else And now I know I loved you just to prove to myself that I could be alone Yeah I alright as far as assholes go... And all I can remember is how much you hated yourself every time you saw me naked Some faded fake shit Taking space never took so much out of me Take it from me
3.
"It's getting pretty late why aren't you texting me, babe?" Wonder why I won't follow you from state to state Fucking pissed about it Go ahead get pissed about it You kicked my dog so I punched you in the face Turn me into someone I ain't ever tryna be Fucking pissed about it Go ahead get pissed about it Oh, I'll see you on the other side You told me about a thousand times To go ahead and kill myself Oh, I ain't gonna commit suicide Don't you know I'm doing fine I'll fuck shit up all by myself I called your bluff I'll send the papers anyway How many others have you fucked since the day Oh! Now you're pissed about it Go ahead get pissed about it Oh, my mom don't like you anyway You thought that I was here to stay Shows how fucking smart you are Oh, I don't got a lot going for myself But I know that I'll be just as well And you can keep the fucking car It's getting awfully late I won't be texting you babe Wonder why I won't follow you from state to state Fucking pissed about Go ahead get pissed about it So fucking pissed about it yea Go piss your pants about it
4.
Is this the end of the world or what we settled for? Better play it safe, color-code the bathroom doors Oh I never knew that taking a shit could be so sexual We all have the right to be converted By a country that thinks that we're all perverted And a reality TV star that thinks that he is a business man Somethings not quite right here Unless you're a cis-white here Shots of tequila We're looking for a fight here Try to find that spark but Fuck you lost your lighter Try to stay enlightened But millennials are brighter Some say we're entitled But need I remind you There's more of us than there are if them Hey girl what you got inside them genes? Though your chromosomes ain't the same as me Oh you might just be the most beautiful thing I've ever seen Somethings not quite right here Unless you're a cis-white here Cards on the table We're looking for a fight here Can't lay down and take it So sorry to break your Fragile idea of How god made us Some say we're entitled But need it remind you There's more of us than there are of them Yea, there's more of us to stand by you There's more of us to stand by you
5.
Sweet Lonny 02:58
Sweet Lonny Your promise is no good to me And "better" only last a week at best Where I sleep Between you and reality And the empty cans you left under the bed Don't remind me what you said What you said to me Cuz you posted it on facebook And you told all our friends It's not about what you said Or what I said to you It's that the last time was the last time I was willing to forget Sweet Lonny Why did you read my diary And cross out things you didn't want to see Your state of denial And every cry I will Think of you and you will think of me I wont tell them what you did What you did to me But anyone who looks at me Can see it on my skin It's not about what you did Or what you didn't do It's that the last time was the last time I was willing to forget You see Lonny A drowning fish needs more to breath Than salty tears that seem to take my place You beg me "please don't go" And put away your sticks and stones And never drink again to make me stay I couldn't tell you where I am Where I am right now But I took the broken pieces Now there's nothing left to fix It's not about where I am Or who I am to you It's that the last time was the last time I was willing to forget
6.
October 03:28
Why can't I pluck you from the world Someone said I'm just a girl I push my fingers in the soil They don't know you but they know what you were going for Since you can't remember then I guess it's all okay I'll survive September (November/December) if you just survive today Though you've asked me for the only thing that's really mine You can have it You can have all the time that's left Why can't I ever get enough When I've already said too much I think I can still smell the gin And the dirty laundry that I should have left you lying in Take it easy on me because I haven't forgotton yet You make it easy for me to pretend we never met And if freedom is affection then you'll get the highest form Of liberation I used to be a lot like you The ones I loved were afraid of me too Now I can finally understand How to kill someone with you having to use your hands
7.
How am I still breathing? Is Old English vegan? Tell me what is this thing that you call water? (Laundy/Stable) Just some age old questions and existential dread Here's to hoping I don't shit myself again Maybe I'll die before I wake I pray to Goddess please don't break my ukulele strings busking for song beer money Tonight I'm sleeping on the couch but you can crash on the front porch Oh wont you bury me, sterilize or marry me? If you can't take me at my worst then you deserve to know that I am best at throwing things into the void and blowing it up Tonight I'm drinking for cure To watch this whole damn city burn And with out knowing it, the best part of me is showing Why is my heart still bleeding for all the ticks and fleas I had to murder to spare my dog? Another luke-warm 40 and existential dread Here's to hoping I don't shit myself again Not again!
8.
Rebound 04:21
I stopped taking the pills I stopped taking all the pills I guess they did what they did now You saw me by the road Painting sunflowers and gold On the side of my van now Just an image for the cops So they'll have some nicer thoughts When they come to take me down I stopped taking the pills I stopped taking all the pills I guess they did what they did now You'll rebound Or did you think I'd hit the road with you? You'll rebound Or did you think I'd leave it all for you? You'll rebound How could you think I'd hit the road with you? You'll rebound Or did you think I'd lose it all to you? No. I stopped taking their shit I stopped taking all their shit Told them pick up and kick rocks All your booze and ciggarettes Wont be paying off my debts Or help my baby move on You can tell me what you feel And I'll associate your guilt With a raging hard on For those with prior engagements For rattling the cage I'm so sorry for your loss I swallowed the pills I swallowed all the pills Just to see if I could get high He shoved his fingers down my throat And we left it by the road At the mercy of the flies It wasn't painless or quick My head mounted on a stick Looking dead in the eyes I swallowed the pills Yea I swallowed all the pills And I didn't even get high
9.
The Ocean 03:48
The sea flat and black The moon round and pale The salt in the air Stings on every inhale You walk to the shore Your feet touch the foam Without looking back You walk in alone In the ocean, you were standing alone The beat of the surf The beat of the drum The beat of your heart They're all beating as one The tide's coming in But it's not here to stay And when it rolls out It will pull you away In the ocean, you were drifting away Did you ever wonder where you'd go? When you abandoned land to join the undertow You slid right in without a splash You never left an epitaph Your name is writ in water not in stone I spent the morning waiting by the phone The coastal wind came in and chilled me to the bone Then I began to understand I can't keep living on the land I walked down to the seashore all alone In the ocean, I'm standing alone
10.
Feels like I've been held captive behind on breakable glass And force my eyes open watch my entire world collapse But if you truly say what you mean Do you really only give a shit about me The longer you hold your breath The closer you get to god The older I seem to get The longer I stay in bed The other day I heard her singing about a broken heart Like it doesn't matter how she tried to tear us apart Some things are just bigger than your feelings honey Some things are more important that your starving need to be seen The longer I stay in bed The colder this cruel world gets Carve into a candle all my love please come to me A crown upon my head I wove myself from weeds Baby these days I just don't have the words In a sort of funny way I'm just letting it burn The longer you let it burn The closer you come to death
11.
Underneath this tough physique is a little girl Who drank too much Redbull Chew my cheek until it bleeds I think I'm gonna hurl It tastes just like Redbull Vodka Redbull glows At the night club We'll see how this night goes Start a fight club Liquid crack could take me back to my drunken days If i could remember Blacking out and then passing out on the apartment steps In the middle of December Oh... I'm feeling amped and in my prime And if that bitch looks at me one more time I'll throw my drink in her face Got to stay awake Got to make it the whole way home I drank too much redbull Liquid crack give me a heart-attack Or at least the shits It burns just like Redbull Vodka Redbull glows Under a black light Did you know that? Did you know? This bitch wants to fight me....
12.
I don't hate you I just hope you get an STI That itches and burns every time you pee and cry Just a little So don't break the seal While you're drinking your feelings tonight My life would be better if you would drop dead Get sold for your organs or popped by the feds You can make it up to me and go straight to hell Drink a gallon of lead paint or fall down a well (and she can as well) I don't hate you I just hope you pass out in the snow And freeze your dick off while the weather is ten below Just as cold As your need for control And I'll be icing your bones alright
13.
I can't sing the way that you do My voice is worn and out of style When it falls silent I still hear you My habits drown it out a while Remember how I tried to kiss you Every time that I got drunk Remember how you swore I'd miss you I laughed it off and said good luck I don't lie the way that you do Unless I'm lying to myself Another angry song about you Another bullet point to sell I don't write the way that you do As if I'm running out of time Cuz I know time turns still and haunts you Leaves you deaf, broken and blind I don't cry the way that you do I make sure to run and hide I don't love the way that you do I'll only say it out of spite Wonder why I didn't chose you As if I even had to chose I could tell you wanted a fight too And I had everything to lose Cuz I don't see the way that you do No, I wont look you in the eye I don't love the way that you do I'll only say it out of spite I can't sing the way that you do My voice is shit and out of key When it falls silent I still hear you When it falls silent it's just me

about

Tinyhands is a beautiful trash-fire of questionable life decisions, unabashed gender fuckery, and anti-fascism. We like to make music about things that people can really relate to like shitting yourself, practicing witchcraft, and blowing coke dealers for drugs. In our first full-length album, I Never Knew Taking a Shit Could Be So Sexual, we introduce our own personal brand of noise pollution: Crusty Emo, or "Cremo" for short. The sounds produced for this album are no less than the bastard love child of Fred Kenyon's suprisingly appealing garbage humor and Jai Bequeaith's Goddess-like picking. Enjoy fuckers.

credits

released February 28, 2018

Music written and performed by Fred Kenyon and Jai Bequeaith

Also featuring Rory Miller

Album art by Chloe McClaren

Recorded and produced in Bummer City

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tinyhands Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Negative people with bullshit instruments

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